why is it that this morning, as i sat at my desk in the freezing cold office, wishing that i had a hat to keep warm, my left armpit began to sweat uncontrollably? also, why during the hour in which my left armpit was doing its impromptu imitation of Niagra Falls was my right side bone dry? i have no answer for these questions. perhaps my understanding of biology is faulty, but i always thought that sweating was the bodily response to nervousness and heat, particularly heat. i was not under the impression that rapidly dropping body temperatures were ameliorated by the increased production of sweat. maybe some scientician or knowledgeologist with an advanced degree will walk in the door and answer my questions, but given the fact that the door is locked at the moment i am probably going to have to answer them for myself.