during my first week at work, i discovered firsthand that when you handle reams of paper day in and day out, your hands sometimes get a little dry, leaving the skin on your hands brittle and susceptible to paper cuts at the slightest touch. fast forward to this afternoon. with dry and hurting hands i was casting about for something to moisten them and water, as it turns out, will only make the problem worse. so when my tired eyes alit upon a tube of Juniper Breeze hand lotion sitting on the window sill my heart leapt with joy, knowing that relief was near at hand. sure, i wasn't particularly interested in smelling like a Juniper Breeze, whatever that is. but my hands were in dire straits. and true, the lotion wasn't mine, which was somewhat problematic. but its owner had left for the day, thus making it fair game on the grounds that if i could have asked permission it would almost certainly have been granted. moving hastily in my greed, i turned the tube over and squeezed, eagerly anticipating relief in the form of a bit of pastel-colored fat or oil-based lotion in my palm. what i got instead was a large squirt of juniper scented water, leaving me with largely unmoistened and thoroughly fruity smelling hands.

there are any number of points i could potentially use this story to illustrate. bring your own lotion if you know you'll want it. don't take things from other people without asking. it is often a good idea to shake well before use. don't store things that should be kept between 40 and 50 degrees C on a window ledge that routinely drops to 35. but i'm not going to do that. what i'm going to do instead is this: i am going to tell you that despite its inanity, this was the most exciting thing to happen to me all day.